Cold Feet
by GracelessLady
Summary: It's only a week to go before big Potter wedding. But damage can a few too many drinks do to a friendship and a relationship. JamesLily, JamesSirius, LilySeverus
1. Chapter 1

James fidgeted outside the door of the apartment, he knew he shouldn't be here today. But his need overtook his common sense and he let himself knock on the thick wood of the door.

"Just a sec." Sirius called from the other side, James let his voice seep into his being, already starting to calm and excited him at the same time, as Sirius's presence was apt at doing.

"James." Surprise coloured Sirius's tone as he opened the door and let James step around him into the tiny apartment. James looked around relaxing in the familiar sights and smells, Sirius could without a doubt afford a larger apartment with his new job, however James knew that the memories the two of them had created in this space was reason enough to hold onto it for a least a couple more years.

"What's up?" James looked up at the comment, he wasn't exactly surprised to see Sirius looking concerned at his presence here, after all he should have been at Lily's parents place enjoying an after rehearsals dinner.

"I skipped out." James replied nonchalantly, only to deepen Sirius's frown.

"You what?"

James sighed, he couldn't really explain what he was feeling to himself much less others, the only thing he knew was that he needed desperately to get away from Lily and her perfect looks and her perfect family and their perfect conversations.

"Can we go out?" Sirius looked at him oddly back eventually complied.

"Wait a sec, I'll just throw on something else."

James rolled his eyes at his friend's vanity, but waited patiently in the living room anyway. Eventually Sirius returned wearing tight dark grey jeans that lay low on his slim hips and a black button up shirt, his sparkling eyes were enhanced by a light outline of eyeliner.

"Ready to go." James said bouncing off the couch and joining his friend out the door.

The music blared, and James moved his jean clad hips to the deep base line almost unconsciously. Sirius grinned next to him taking another sip of the outrageously girly drink James had brought him. James tried to stifle a laugh when he saw an obviously gay man try to rub up against his friend.

"Serves you right for wearing makeup." James yelled in his ear once Sirius had managed to rebuff the guy's advances.

Sirius just grinned.

After a minute's lag in conversation, Sirius turned to his friend. "So are you going to tell me why you didn't go to Lily's thing?"

James looked away irritated he had brought Sirius out with him to forget about all of that. As if reading James's mind Sirius took him wrist and yelled over the music, "Want to dance?"

Nodding enthusiastically James took a final gulp of his beer and allowed Sirius to drag him through the crowd of people and onto the dance floor. Almost immediately the pair were joined by a few eager looking girls, Sirius smiled cockily over at his friend. As James swayed to the music, arm around a pretty, unknown stranger he wondered when he had got so drunk.

He felt a soft but insistent tug of his arm and followed the familiar back, through the crowd to the bar and thrust a plastic cup of water in his face. Once he had swallowed the liquid he looked up see Sirius swaying in front of him.

"Ok, really, what's going on?"

James grabbed the edge of the bar steadying himself against the new onslaught of dizziness. "I dunno, just getting cold feet, a bit, I guess."

Sirius gave him a strange look before shaking his head. "That's pretty common, I guess, I didn't really have you pegged as the cold feet kind of guy, especially since you've been planning your wedding with Lily since you were fifteen."

Shrugging James looked back at the swaying crowd of people.

"You know what you need," Sirius said, a cheshire cat grin gracing his handsome face.

"Strippers?" James joked, only to be hit on the back of his head.

"No, you idiot, a good laugh. Watch this." With one last sinister smile, Sirius turned around and walked towards a large, heavily tattooed man who had just kissed a girl whom one would assume to be his girlfriend, before she snuck back onto the dance floor. James snorted as Sirius exaggerated his hip swinging while he walked. In a planned, graceful manoeuvre, Sirius pretended to trip, landing carefully across the man's lap. James watched, pearls of laughter peeling from his throat only to be lost in the backbeat thundering through the club, as Sirius flirted with the obviously uncomfortable and highly masculine man. Sirius kicked his flirting up a notch, and James watched on amused, as the man turned from fearful to outright angry.

"Time to go." Sirius said fluidly making his back to James and grabbing his wrist. James glanced behind to watch the man follow them rage clearly showing in his expression.

Together hand in hand Sirius and James ran through the London streets, they probably weren't being chased anymore but running through the cold night air was extremely exhilarating. Sirius steered them into a side street, and both man bent double laughing while trying to catch their breaths.

Still smiling James stood up straight only to sway alarmingly.

"Whoa there," Sirius said, reaching out to clasp his shoulder and steady him.

James's smile faded as he looked at Sirius's face, his silky hair, long lashes framing sparkling grey eyes, and his lips pump and rose-coloured contrasting beautifully with his ivory complexion. _He's beautiful_ James thought.

Slowly as if in under water, James leant forward capturing Sirius's lips. Sirius was quick to respond applying pressure back and opening his mouth and James willing inserted his tongue. Something clicked and the kiss turned violent, James desperately seized Sirius slamming his back against the wall pressing his body hard against his. Sirius moaned, his hands curling in James's messy hair, James gripped at Sirius's narrow hips.

There was a loud bang somewhere to their left, and both men flew apart as if electrocuted. James spared Sirius one frighten glance before disapparating.

"Prongs, James." Sirius yelled out, but it was too late. "Fuck!"

James slid quietly into bed.

Sleepily Lily rolled over, "Hey, how was Sirius? Crisis averted?"

"Yeah, just family problems, you know?" Lily smiled sympathetically and rolled back over, mumbling goodnight.

It was only moments before her breathing evened out signalling her return to sleep. James on the other hand wasn't so lucky. Staring at the ceiling he wondered how on Earth in one night he had managed to endanger his relationship with the bride and the friendship with the best man, all only a week before the wedding.


	2. Chapter 2

Lily was in front of him, her pretty face smiling in the sunshine, her red hair vibrant. James smiled happily as she danced spinning around on the soft green grass, all just for him. Slowing down she walked toward him and leant forward to whisper in his ear.

Then suddenly it was Sirius who had whispered in his ear. Grabbing his wrist, Sirius dragged him though the door into what was unmistakably Hogwarts. James allowed himself to be pulled though secret shortcuts and trip doors. He laugh at the happiness and freedom that their sprint brought. Sirius stopped suddenly and turned around.

And they were kissing tongues scouring the others mouth, teeth clashing and hand roaming. James wanted him closer, however slowly but surely Sirius disappeared from his grasp, only to be replaced the white ceiling.

James startled awake, sneaking a glance at the other side of the bed only to sigh in relief. _Lily must have already woken up_ he thought. Dragging himself from the bed, he threw on his clothes and descended the stairs. It had been two days since the incident and every night since James had had the same dream.

"Morning James, dear," Lily greeted him smiling, "Breakfast?" She asked sliding some pancakes onto a clean plate.

James felt guilt twist in his stomach, what was he doing? Lily was absolutely perfect how could he possibly have thought about anybody but her?

As Lily placed the food on the table and James dug in, she said lightly handing over a piece of parchment. "Sirius owled again."

James took the paper and stuck in his pocket, Sirius had been owling him constantly since that night, probably because James had severed all contact for the last two days.

Lily frowned. "Are you going to read it? It might be about his family again."

Resisting the urge to roll his eyes, James took the letter out and unfolded it. As he expected it was just a short:

_We need to talk. Stop ignoring me. Sirius_.

James shook his head. "It's fine, nothings up. I'll reply later."

Lily nodded, but did not look entirely convinced.

Only a couple of hours later, there was a loud knock on the door. James answered it with a sinking heart, he had a strong suspicion as to who it was. His guess was proved right as Sirius stood at the front door looking quite irate. James let himself be pulled out the door and out into the sunshine on the front lawn, out of earshot of the house.

"So what were you planning on doing, never talking to me again?" Sirius said, his grey eyes flashing.

"Something like that," James replied, his mind adding_ at least until those dreams went away._

Sirius let out a frustrated snort. "Ok, look, we were drunk and you're nervous about the wedding. Can we just leave it at that and forget about the whole thing?"

James blinked, surprised at how easy it all was, and then nodded. Sirius, looking relieved, ran a hand through his long and hair and together they walk back to the house.

"Sirius," Lily called running down the stairs to greet him warmly with a hug and kiss on the cheek.

James watched as his soon-to-be wife and best friend hugged and kissed and felt as jealousy reared its ugly head within him, but the thing that concerned him the most was who was he really jealous of Sirius or Lily.

Irritated with himself, James quickly grabbed his broom and yelled that he was going flying to the people behind him.

"Do you want to go with him?" Lily asked.

Sirius shook his head. "I don't think he would appreciate that."

Lily sighed. "Did you two have a falling out?"

"Something like that." Lily smiled sadly at him.

"You'll work it out, I'm sure." Lily said, confidently.

Sirius smiled followed Lily into the kitchen.

Sitting in the kitchen sharing conversation over tea an owl interrupted Sirius and Lily, rapping on the window. Lily got up removing the letter from the owls leg, but before she could offer it some water or treats it was gone.

Lily frowned, but moved her attention to the letter in her hand. Opening it, she scanned it quickly, gasping softly. Sirius stood up in concern.

"Everything alright?" he asked.

Lily closed her eyes briefly pressing the letter against her chest. "Yes I'm fine."

Sirius looked into her stunning green eyes, guilt clawing at his stomach how could he have ever done anything to hurt such a lovely woman. "Are you sure?"

"You'll think I'm a horrible person." She said softly.

Sirius laughed at that. "Come on Lily, I'm a Black how could I possibly think someone else is a horrible person."

Sighing Lily sat back down at the table with Sirius following.

"It was from Severus, he's not coming to the wedding." Her green eyes glittered with unshed tears. "It's silly, isn't it?" She said wiping frustrated at her tears.

Sirius shook his head, he may not have ever liked or even tolerated the boy, but he had been able to observe over their years together at Hogwarts just how had meant to each other. Taking her hand comfortingly he looked into her eyes earnestly. "It's not silly."

Lily smiled gratefully, letting them sit in companionable silence for a minute.

"Please don't tell James. I just don't want him to worry, it's nothing really."

Sirius nodded reassuringly. "I should probably head off, if you're ok."

"You don't want to stay for dinner?"

Sirius shook his head. "Thanks, but no thanks. I don't think James would particularly appreciate that at the moment."

"Well it's not really his decision. You're as much a part of this family as he is." She replied with a tinkling laugh.

Sirius smiled feeling Lily warmth fill him up and chase away the dark shadows of self-doubt that had swelled inside him in James's absence.

A/N: I hope you enjoyed it, let me know what you think


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